10 Things I Want My Daughter to Know About Working Out
Mid-way through a recent group exercise class, the teacher lost me. She didn’t lose me because of some complicated step sequence or insanely long set of burpees; I mentally checked out because of a few words she kept saying over and over. “Come on! Get that body ready for your winter beach vacation! Think about how you want to look at those holiday parties! PICTURE HOW YOU’LL LOOK IN THAT DRESS!”
“THAT DRESS?” My brain couldn’t focus on an image of some random dress hanging in my closet. All I could think about was my three-year-old daughter hearing and trying to process those words.
My daughter’s little brain is making sense of the world every single second, taking in verbal and non-verbal cues about how things work and what things mean. And when it comes to exercise, I want her to grow up seeing it as a joy, and not a utility…as a gift, and not a chore…as an opportunity, not an obligation. I want her to do it for the love of it, not to fit into a dress. I want her to grow up knowing that…
- Strength equals self-sufficiency. Being strong – particularly as a woman – is empowering. It will feel good someday to be able to carry your own luggage down the stairs if the airport escalator is broken, and it will be important to have a solid shot at outrunning a stranger should you meet one a dark alley.
- Fitness opens doors. Being healthy and fit can help you see the world differently. The planet looks different from a bike or a pair of skis than it does from a car or an airplane. Out in the elements you have the time and space to notice details and meet people and remember smells and bugs and mud and rain and the feeling of warm sunshine on your face. And those are the moments that make up your life.
- The bike is the new golf course. Being fit may help you get a seat at the table. Networking is no longer restricted to the golf course, and the stronger you are – and the more people you can hang with on the road and trail – the more people you’ll meet.
- Exercise is a lifestyle, not an event. Being an active person isn’t about taking a class three times a week at the gym. It’s about things like biking to the grocery store and parking your car in the back of the lot and walking instead of taking a cab and catching up with friends on a hiking trail instead of a bar stool.
- Health begets health. Healthy behavior inspires healthy behavior. Exercise. Healthy eating. Solid sleep. Positive relationships. These things are all related.
- Endorphins help you cope. A good sweat session can clear the slate. You will have days when nothing seems to go right…when you’re dizzy with frustration or crying in despair. A workout can often turn things around.
- Working out signals hard-working. The discipline required to work out on a regular basis signals success. Someone recently told me they are way more likely to hire marathon runners and mountain climbers because of the level of commitment that goes into those pursuits.
- If you feel beautiful, you look beautiful. Looking beautiful starts on the inside. And being fit and strong feels beautiful.
- Nature rules. And if you’re able to hike/run/bike/swim/ski/snowshoe, you can see more of it.
- Little eyes are always watching. We learn from each other. You may have a daughter—or a niece or a neighbor or a friend – one day. And that little girl will be watching and listening to everything you say and do. What messages do you want her to hear?
I’ll never talk to my daughter about fitting into THAT DRESS. But I will talk to her about what it sounds like to hear pine needles crunching under my feet and what it feels like to cross a finish line and how special it is to see the world on foot. I will talk to her about hard work and self sufficiency. I will teach her the joy of working out by showing her I love it. And I’ll leave the rest up to her.
Trackbacks & Pingbacks
- 10 Things I Want My Daughter to Know About Working Out | psychotraining
- shared: 10 Things I Want My Daughter to Know About Working Out | treadmillconfessional
- Why I Love Working Out! | Get Fit With Les
- Holistic view on exercise | A little more Life in life
- 10 Things I Want My Daughter to Know About Working Out | MadeleineMaya
- 10 Things I Want My Daughter to Know About Working Out | The Mindset Effect
- A shoutout to Wellfesto | Cuddles and Common Sense
- Quiet Warriors Quotes | Delightful Oak
- Health and Fitness Advice | The Fish Chronicles
- The REAL reasons women should work out | lisaramel
- https://wellfesto.com/2013/11/19/10-things-i-want-my-daughter-to-know-about-working-out/ | lisaramel
- Thoughts Wrap Up – Encountering Life.
wellfesto 
Reblogged this on Thoughts into Fruition and commented:
As a budding positive psychologist, I found this article that gives a great example of being “autotelic” (performing an activity in and of itself with no expected outcome). The key to enjoying life is being involved with every detail of our experience, and this blog post has some great advice on how to do so, specifically when it comes to exercising! I hope you enjoy it as much as I did!
Honest. Uncomplicated. Love it.
We talk about the celebration of healthy living on our retreats rather than on the negative aspect of detox and deprivation. Same result – joy!
How true and thought provoking this is. Thank you, I really enjoyed reading this x
Inspirational Jen. Thanks for sharing.
Reblogged this on rain sharmin • chasing clouds and catching stars .
Here here, I heard my mother talk to my 5 year old niece “don’t you want to look pretty?” Talking about what she was wearing, wanting her to change before other relatives arrived, I was horrified, and said so.
Reblogged this on 23lenses and commented:
yes!
I have to reread and remember this for myself as well as my daughter. I am now following you.
Glad it resonated. Thanks so much!
Reblogged this on A little more Life in life.
Reblogged this on Nav Kaur .
Reblogged this on journeytotheabyss.
Thanks so much! Glad you liked the article!
Such powerful and inspirational words! I like the thought that a lot of people are now concerned with health and wellbeing. Showing a good example to a child is the best way to teach them good health. With these days’ lifestyle, a serious amount of effort is required to be healthy.
Reblogged this on below the asian standards and commented:
It’s pretty easy to underestimate the importance of exercise, especially when you have access to wonderful things like the internet and TV. That being said, exercise and getting in shape has so many benefits—and it keeps you healthy. I think girls tend to forget that exercise is a way to stay healthy and not just a way to lose weight; it’s better to be fit and healthy than thin and frail.
Beautiful! Simply loved it 🙂 🙂 🙂 thanks!
Reblogged this on ponderingsandgreentea and commented:
Efficient!
Hi, thank you so much for this post. I stumbled upon it from another blog I follow and it has really rung true to me. I have a young sister and she has just reached the stage where girls at her school are focussed on how much they eat and worried about how ‘fat’ they look. I’m a proud believer in being proud of your unique strength and beauty, physically and figuratively. Your poignant points above have for me, reiterated the importance of being outdoors and being our best selves. And I thank you for such a lovely reminder.
Reblogged this on HealthyHappyFashionista and commented:
I don’t have a daughter yet, but this is what I want to pass on one day…and for now, what I want to pass on to my sisters and friends. xox
Great message
Thanks for sharing
Amen to this post, especially #6. I’ve had times where I felt like life sucked… then I just hoop danced for about 1/2 an hour. It’s amazing how much my mood improved! I also approve of #9 as well. Exercise shouldn’t be just about trying to be a certain size or about fitting in a dress. Love this post! Every woman should read this.
Amazing and Inspiring- thank you for the positive thoughts! Its refreshing to hear a male figure giving his daughter healthy expectations in a world that has so many negative ones. There should be more men like you in the world!
The writer of this blog is a female… I do hope plenty of men out there are helping pass on healthy expectations like these to their daughters, though!
Wonderful post and this is why I, as a young adult woman, have chosen to make my life an active one (something my parents didn’t model for me). If my lifestyle is active then I believe that my future family’s will be too, and my kids will grow up with a healthy appreciation of what exercise does for your mind, soul, and body!
Ive just started working out and this gives some inspiration.
Reblogged this on ableoakleaves.
I love everything about what you’ve said. I think this is a great lesson for everyone, including teenagers, who have lost sight about the true purpose of physical fitness and wellness. It’s not about looking like a supermodel; it’s about feeling good in your own skin, becoming resilient, and living a healthier life for you and those you love. Teaching by example and sharing your experiences together is the best way to help others embody something you are truly passionate about. Too often we rely on the wrong example to motivate people to become physically fit rather than making it a joyful process of learning and finding out what “fit” means to you. We don’t all “fit” into one mold; we each have to make our own way. By saying comments like “work hard so you can wear that bikini this summer” is just a surface level way to motivate others. It doesn’t elicit any thoughts about inner strength and inner beauty, which are so much more powerful than what is on the outside. I love that you have taught your daughter to embody your passion, but that ultimately, it’s up to her. That’s empowerment at its finest.
YES! I love everything YOU said. Thank you for this. 🙂
Reblogged this on Resiliency Fitness and commented:
Read this inspiring post about the images we may be projecting to our children about physical fitness and wellness. Think about the messages we are sending our youth about working out. Are these images what we want them to see? Or just what society tells us they should see? Empowerment doesn’t come with fitting into a mold, or that bikini, or trying to look like someone on the cover of a magazine. It comes from teaching inner strength, passing on our own values, and sharing our passions with people we love and want to inspire.
This is wonderful, and I completely agree!! Cheers to a healthful life. Thanks for sharing!
I love this! Wonderful and so true. Beautiful words.
Expecting my first, a little girl, and this concisely sums what I want her to learn from me. I know your daughter will thank you – perhaps not in words, but through living well.
I am avid fitness lover and train to compete in endurance events. I have 10 and 8 year old daughters who are very aware of the images life presents to them. We don’t use the words “fat” or “dieting” in our house. They have been replaced with “fit” and “healthy eating”. I am proud to say that my 10 year old recently requested to join an 8km mud run with me and we completed the course as a team – a memory we are both very proud of.
Excellent! This may sound corny, but this really touched my heart in a deep way. You have a gift for putting all of our thoughts into proper, meaningful words. So many times, I’ve wanted to express to others how “working out” is so much more than “looking good naked” or fitting into “that dress”. You’ve done a perfect job! Well said, Brynn; well said!
Thank you so much for such a heartfelt comment, Teri. Really appreciate your kind words, and am so glad this message resonated with you. 🙂
As a group fitness trainer I LOVED this article! I do my best to be careful what I say to motivate and inspire my class participants..it’s all about creatively touching that inner athlete that is inside ALL of us, and this does not, and should not EVER involve becoming a certain ‘size’ or ‘bodytype’. It should always be about the beauty found in a strong heart, healthy body, and invigorated spirit 🙂 YOU ROCK!
It sounds liked I’d like your classes. Keep it up! And thanks for the comment!
Reblogged this on Activism for Equality.
This article is so good, I like this blog, Thank you very much for sharing
Twitted to all our followers what a positive and inspiring messages – thanks
Excellent reminder and insight! And, maybe one day my daughter will like burpees 🙂
Good advice!
Reblogged this on chitwankam and commented:
Like this
Reblogged this on KoKo-MiA and commented:
I absolutely adore this inspiring post by a mum. I hope that I can nourish and grow a healthy attitude to health and fitness in my little one. And it starts with me.
I hear you. I started exercising as a chore but after reading your blog i kicked myself a couple of times telling myself how did i not see this. Thanks its really awe-inspiring